


Unrequited

by alstweinLUVIA



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Community: kakasaku, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Kakashi is angsty, Past Relationship(s), Secret Identity, Teacher-Student Relationship, you can read it as side dish sasunaru
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2019-03-01 14:37:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13296963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alstweinLUVIA/pseuds/alstweinLUVIA
Summary: Professor Hatake is NOT in love with his Calculus student Haruno Sakura. That's fine because she's definitely interested in Sukea though. KakaSaku College AU Oneshot.





	Unrequited

The sound of pen furiously gliding on paper fills his dorm room and Kakashi doesn't have the mind to get irritated with the grating rolling sound it makes. He's too busy checking, and crossing, and circling, and putting large F's on each paper, because as easy as one plus one is, his students keep failing his calculus class as quickly as answering two.

He's got forty three students in this block section and only two were smart enough to get a grade higher than F. He stops for a few seconds to unclench his right hand and yawn. In the next second, he continues as furiously as before.

He slows when he's at student no. 40 and furrows his brows at the beautiful tiger doodle on the lower right of the paper. He sighs and clicks his tongue thinking about that Sai kid and his eerie smiles.

He puts an F on that paper too, and another on Inuzuka's and Uzumaki's papers. He cracks his neck before proceeding to the last paper and prepares to give it an F also, when he glances at the name at the top written eloquently in blue ink.

_Haruno Sakura_

Jade eyes, pearly white teeth biting on a plump lower lip, and the scent of minty rain mixed with sweat washes over him.

He freezes and his heart skips a few important beats. _No_. Not this memory. _Never_  this memory.

But the feeling overwhelms him, recaptures his essence, and traps him in it forever. That day when he-- _Goddamnit--_ he's _not_ in love with her. Kakashi slams his forehead onto the desk and groans miserably.

"I am  _not_ in love with Haruno Sakura." He repeats loudly for the world to believe, for _himself_ to believe.

He hears the ticking of the wall clock and glances at it. It's half past two in the morning. He was so sleepy and tired just two seconds ago, that it's with an unwilling mind that he's so thoroughly awake now. It's as if Pakkun hand fed him (paw fed rather) with coffee beans. He might as well drink some caffeine at that 24-hour cafe a corner away from his dormitory.

He takes the checked papers and stuffs them in an envelope. He hates seeing stacks of paper so he makes it his mini missions to hide them as inconspicuously as possible. The envelope felt light in his hand as he stuffs that too inside one of the cabinets of his desk.

The red pen began to roll off of the desk as Sakura's paper slips off too. He catches both when they dropped and tosses the pen in a pen holder. He stares at the paper in his hand and sighs, placing it neatly back on the desk and using a plastic cactus decoration named Mr. Ukki, as a place holder. 

Mr. Ukki was a gift from one of his students, Uzumaki Naruto, hoping to bribe him in passing the Preliminaries. Sadly, he still didn't pass that day. The fake cactus is the only thing in Kakashi's dorm room that showed his home-y side. His room was bare of personal decorations, and he thinks his place could be robbed and the only thing worth taking is Mr. Ukki and his shuriken printed bed sheets. And maybe Pakkun too, if the thief liked wrinkly, lazy dogs.

Kakashi isn't really a touchy person. He enjoys his minimalistic living because he's only a part time college professor for a semester before moving abroad to study again.

After placing his immaculate hospital mask on his face, he exits the dormitory and is about to turn a corner, when two men bumps into him. The blonde one bows and apologizes immediately but the dark haired one scowls before his eyes widen for a split second after seeing him.

"It's only Hatake, Naruto. Stop apologizing." The dark haired man says and elbows the blonde.

"Huh? Kaka-sensei?" Naruto straightensand eyes his professor dumbly. "Why are you still awake?"

"Why are  _you_ still awake?" Kakashi replies with quirk of a brow. "And  _only_ Hatake? You hurt you're teacher, Sasuke. Might as well take that A- back and stamp an F on your paper."

Sasuke glares and shoulders past him. Kakashi watches the Uchiha go and turns back to the blonde at his back.

"Sensei, how about me? Did I pass?" Naruto asks with a grin and Kakashi's eyes crinkle in sadistic amusement.

"Good job, Naruto."

"Aw, sweet! I pas--"

"You got an F." Kakashi says cheerfully and Naruto sags at that. "Cheer up. Don't tell anyone yet, but I'll be giving a retake on Monday. So run along now and study hard."

"Kaka-sensei, you really are the worst _and_ the best!" Naruto mock salutes and follows after Sasuke.

Kakashi chuckles to himself and continues walking for the cafe. "I won't be surprised if they all pass next time." He tells himself and eyes the cafe just around the corner.

He sees a group of familiar people enter the shop and groans inwardly as he recognizes Ino, Shikamaru, and Choji, three students from his calculus class. He turns back immediately and heads back to his dorm.

"What is it with these kids walking around at this hour of the night?" He mutters sulkily and rips open his wardrobe. He removes his white hospital mask and takes a dark green bomber jacket. He wears it over his gray form fitting shirt and takes a brown wig from the back of his closet.

He walks to the bathroom and accidentally kicks Pakkun who is sleeping on the door mat; the disgruntled pug wakes up with a jolt and a bark.

"Sorry." Kakashi pets the wrinkly dog and proceeds to the bathroom cabinet.

His reflection looks back at him in the mirror and Kakashi runs a hand through his unkempt silver hair. He opens the cabinet and takes out two purple strips of temporary tattoo stickers, a contact lenses container, and an eye shadow palette. He puts on the gray contact lenses that hides his dark eyes, slaps the purple strips on his cheeks, and applies purple shades on his eyelids.

He checks himself in the mirror and takes the brown wig sitting on the sink. He haphazardly throws the wig on his head and it immediately molds and styles itself onto him with just a few tugs. He's worn the wig too many times already that it's almost as if it's his real hair.

Kakashi examines himself again in the mirror and sees the small almost imperceptible mole on his chin. He's unrecognizable from the calculus professor in terms of physical appearance, that the only give away would be his clear baritone voice. So he vocalizes until his deep timbre is hidden smoothly in a light and calming tenor.

He looks down when he feels a certain pug's eyes on him, and sure enough, Pakkun is wagging his tail and looking up at him expectantly.

_Take me with you._ Kakashi swears he can hear his dog talk sometimes.

"No." He tells the pug and Pakkun yips sadly. "I'll just grab some coffee, be back real quick. I'm still not done with my lesson plans. I'll be awake 'til the sun rises."

Pakkun snubs him and goes back to sleep on the mat. Kakashi almost felt guilty not bringing his dog out when he remembers just how lazy pugs are. He'll only be dragging and carrying the little legged dog. He tiptoes over Pakkun and exits the dorm, walking slowly this time so he could keep an eye out for more students he might see along the way.

Just as he was about to enter the café, the Ino-Shika-Cho trio exits, buzzing about something on their phones and Kakashi couldn't help but overhear his other blonde student.

"That Kakashi-sensei is gay for Naruto! How does he even convince that cold-hearted professor to go easy on us  _every damn time_?" Ino aggravates as she stares at her phone.

"Troublesome," Sighs Shikamaru. "At least, we get to retake it and be prepared this time because we already know what's in the test. So stop complaining."

"Hmph! You're one to talk, Shika! Sensei separated you and put you at the back so nobody could copy from your paper. He  _knows_ you're smart like that so he practically forced you to answer it." Ino replies and Kakashi smiles knowingly at what she said.

The trio disappears from earshot and Kakashi proceeds to the counter. He orders a cup of coffee and a muffin, and strides to the only empty booth in the cafe. It's the only 24 hour coffee in the campus and it's no doubt the place for people like him, pulling all-nighters. Half of the customers are professors and the other half are a group of students working on their thesis. 

He spies no one familiar, and proceeds to munch on his muffin and enjoy his warm steaming coffee. He is about to chug down the still tongue scalding beverage so he could return to grading Sakura's paper, when the cafe bell rings and pink floods the corner of his eyes. He flicks his gray-lensed orbs to the woman who entered, and there, ordering a box of her favorite blueberry cheesecake, is Haruno Sakura.

Speak of the devil and she shall come.

"Well, shit. I  _really_ didn't need coffee after all." Kakashi mutters and tries his best to ignore her and the sudden jump of his heart. He stares resolutely at his cup and nervously sips on it, waiting for the woman to take her order and leave.

There aren't any available booths anymore and the only unoccupied seat is the one bench he's sitting on that's at least for two people. He's sure she wouldn't ask to share with him because he just saw her grab her box of cheesecake and turn to leave, but as he sees her reach for the door knob, she suddenly looks back at him and he freezes.

Kakashi has been in many street fights in his teenage years, and death always shadowed him after each fist to his head, and each knife to his leg. The shot of adrenaline ate his fear whole and it made him feel immortal and brave. He is the one parents tell their children not to become if they value their right little finger. Everyone actually thought he is with the Yakuza. He strives off of this rumor because it's one more for his list of why he is fearless.

Funny, how it's his first time getting scared and he's not sure if it's because of excitement or anxiousness. It could be both because he has stared at Sakura for far too long and she's already turned her body to face him.

He hastily goes back to staring at his cup. His heart hammers against his chest as the ghostly feel of the curve of a waist passes over his hands, a groan echoes hollowly in his ears, and the scent of mint and rain shoots through his senses.

_Fuck, not this again._

He listens for a few seconds if the bell rings, signifying her leave, but as the chatter of the cafe fills his ears, he's absolutely certain that he's doomed. He takes a sip of his coffee and forces himself to relax. Dread simmers in his stomach and he hasn't even noticed that he's munched his muffin in just two bites.

_Nobody_ has seen his face in this campus. He always wears his immaculate hospital mask, and when he doesn't, he's in this disguise that has _never_ failed him. Until maybe now, where he feels an unfaltering gaze at the back of his head. He's already repeated  _shit_ six times and he calms a little at the seventh muttering. He takes another sip of his coffee, and assumes she must have found an unoccupied seat and chose not leave.

Kakashi sighs a last  _shit_ to himself and relaxes. Thinking that she must've just found an empty booth that he didn't see, eating her cheesecake, and ignoring everyone else. He ignores everything else too and concentrates resolutely on his coffee, internally laughing at his own stupid paranoia.

"Mind if I sit with you?"

" _Shit._ "

"Excuse me?"

"Sit." Kakashi laughs nervously and nods his head.

Sakura gives him a smile as she sits down and places her boxed blueberry cheescake on the low table. He smiles weakly in return and determinedly eyes the dozing professor at the next booth. Not at all ignoring the woman beside him. Not at all. 

"So," She starts and Kakashi glances at her way briefly, not meeting her in the eyes. "I'm Sakura from Engineering."

"Sukea Kurou." Kakashi tells her smoothly. He's used to being Sukea because he's had a bad first day there as Professor Hatake months ago. His silvery-white hair and bored dark eyes had a few students offering their seats to him because they thought he was a senior citizen.

Since then, Kakashi has transformed into Sukea when students were in the vicinity of where he's casually going, to avoid some inadvertent offense that really only harms his appearance.

Sakura looks at him curiously and reaches for the box on the table. She opens it and pulls out two plastic forks, taking the white one, and handing the red one to Kakashi. 

"What's this for?" He asks apprehensively, shooting her a suspicious look because he's suddenly feeling anxious about where this conversation is going.

"If I share my cheescake with you, will you tell me about yourself?" She says with a sly smile and Kakashi is dumbstruck, nostalgia knocks at his proverbial door.

_No way._

He's not going to assume but... Was Haruno Sakura really hitting on him? Because that was _exactly_ what she did back when they-- _OH._

Kakashi suddenly feels cold. He laughs bitterly and stands.

Sakura eyes him with a surprised expression. Kakashi thinks she's probably never had someone react to her the way he did.

"Sukea? Is everything alright?"

It's clear now. This is her way of _befriending_  men. Her way of charming them, charming  _him_ , by using her innate benevolence, and her beauty it seems, is just the cherry on the top.

_"D'you want a cherry on top?"_  Her teasing voice resounds in his mind, the innuendo too clear in that memory, a memory so powerful he begins to hate it.

She had him fooled then. He was one of many. Kakashi concludes this in the moment that she reaches for him with a familiar hand. A touch meant to pull him back to her web but he knew better. He ignores her and strides out of the cafe.

The coldness festers in his chest. In that moment, he becomes immune to her wiles. Like a vice that grips his heart, he discards the feeling.

He was right to admit it; he is _not_ in love with Haruno Sakura.

"Sukea!" He hears her call for him when he reaches the corner outside. He runs the next two blocks and circles back to the next street to return to his dorm without Sakura seeing him. He knows that she knows where Kakashi lives. It would be an even bigger mess if she knew  _Sukea_ lived under the same roof as Kakashi.

He bursts through the hall of his dormitory building and sits on the stairs, panting. He didn't get tired from running but the freezing weight that presses on his chest makes it hard for him to breathe. It's something he's felt before, but he refuses to acknowledge it because Haruno Sakura did not break his heart if he wasn't in love with her in the first place.

He sighs and lies back on the stairs.

_Fuck my life._

The coffee that he drank still runs in his system but exhaustion of something else weighs him down, lulling him to sleep. The stairs was more comfortable than the truth he uncovered earlier anyway.

The coffee still did its job because he wakes half an hour later to a stiff neck, and the edge of a step slicing his lower back. Kakashi groans and sits up, rubbing his neck and trying to fight the dull ache in his chest. The thirty minutes of total unconsciousness did nothing to erase the pain that carves his insides, so he resolves to bury it in furious paper grading and lesson planning from hell.

He stands on his feet and trudges up the flight of stairs to his dorm room. Closing the door behind him, he strides into his room with anger directed at the paper on his desk when a pink speck comes into his vision. He swivels his eyes to the person sitting cross legged on his bed and stares in shock. His hands immediately fly to his wig, fearing he left it at the stairs when he fell asleep.

She can't know about the man under the wig. Thankfully, the brown locks were still sitting on his head as if it grew there.

"You're in private property. I suggest you leave before I call for campus marshals." Kakashi says coolly. His tenor long forgotten, the baritone of his voice registers too late, his eyes widen with that small mistake. He hopes Sakura didn't notice, but the small smile on her pretty face shows him that she did.

"I don't think you will." She says flirtily and Kakashi turns away.

"Please leave."

"Not until you share my cheesecake with me, Sukea." 

Rage bubbles inside him and he snaps. Facing her again with fury in his eyes, he stalks closer to her. She meets him halfway, her eyes blazing with something so familiar, it ignites the fire in his heart that he so begs to remove. He towers over her but she isn't one to be bullied into kowtowing, and Kakashi admires-- _admired_ \--her for this.

"You tell that to every man, do you?" He challenges her to say it to his face so he can finally extinguish the stupid feeling in his gut.

She pulls her head back with a gasp, scandalized.  _She even has the gall to look offended._ Kakashi thinks distastefully.

"What do you mean?" She says indignantly, putting her hands on her hips.

"Stop playing games, Sakura! You know what I mean."

"I don't! I don't, okay?" She explodes in his face, grabbing onto the lapels of his jacket, shaking him. "I don't understand."

Kakashi has had enough.

"So it's like that, huh? It comes naturally to you." He says, putting his hands on her shoulders to push her away, the firmness of her flesh, and the softness of her skin vividly brings a memory before his eyes but he squashes it with his wrath.

"I did nothing wrong, what are you saying?" Sakura pushes on with a tone Kakashi now perceives as dishonesty.

" _Cheesecake_ is a pretty word for sex, don't you think?" Kakashi spits _cheesecake_  as if it scalded his tongue and Sakura's face falls.

"What are you talking about?" Her eyes widen in shock.

"How many men before me?"

"What?" 

"How many men, Sakura?" Kakashi bores her down with a glare but Sakura defies him with her own blazing greens.

"Only you." She says steadily.

" _Bullshit_!"

"I swear, only you."

"And after me?" Kakashi asks angrily.

"None after you."

_Liar._

Kakashi turns his back to her and paces away, leaning on the doorway of the bathroom. He sighs heavily. He doesn't want to see her lie to his face. Not with this next question.

"Remember Professor Hatake?"

"Professor...?" Sakura trails off, puzzled.

_Oh, as if you don't know._ Kakashi scoffs.

"That silver haired bastard you fucked two summers ago." He says and there's a long pause between them.

Sakura doesn't speak. _You're caught red handed now._  Kakashi thinks, and then another thought hits him, chilling him to the bone.

"How old were you?" He asks breathlessly because he's going to get sick if he remembers the smell of minty rain mixed with sweat again.

"Eighteen." She says quietly and Kakashi doubts her.

"Is that true?" He asks nervously.

"It is the truth."

Kakashi heaves another sigh. _God,_ he almost fucked up. Why hadn't he just kept it in his pants? Now though, he can't keep it in his heart.

"He's my friend... that Kakashi. He told me many things." Kakashi covers with a half-truth.

"You told him you loved him." He says softly into the night, still refusing to face her.

"I did."

"You left him a winter ago."

"I did."

"When you met him again you acted as if nothing happened."

"I did."

"You broke his heart." Kakashi says but his voice breaks, he takes a shuddering breathe to calm himself, gathering his resolve.

"Please get out." He says evenly.

Sakura is still quiet, he silently wills her to speak but he loses the battle and turns to face her silence. Gray eyes meet jade and Kakashi is struck with the regret and despondence in her eyes.

"I'm sorry I left him. I didn't mean to."  Her tiny voice fleets between them.

"I couldn't come near him. I wouldn't get him fired." She says, staring him down with a humorous glint in her green orbs but it disappears as quickly as it came, replaced by that same regret that painted her face.

"I want to fix what I broke." She steps forward hesitantly, as if giving him the choice to allow her to come closer.

"I love him. Always had, always will." She closes the space between them, envelops him in her arms, and buries her face in his chest. "I love you. Always had, always will."

With that she tugs his hair and the brown locks fall off of his head.

_How did she...?_ He _never_ took off his mask. No one knew Sukea. Nobody has seen his face in this campus. So how?

_"I agree with hiding your face." She says as she lays on top of him, naked under the covers, eyes sparkling, and lips swollen and angry pink. "Someone might attempt to snatch you away from me."_

"I knew, the moment I saw you at the cafe." Sakura looks up at him.

"But I--"

"I'll know your face anywhere."

Kakashi cries silently. The tears dripping heavily down his cheeks. He doesn't understand what he's feeling. He's euphoric, and ashamed, and humored, and incredibly grateful that he's crying and laughing at the same time.

He envelops Sakura in his arms and buries his face in her neck, inhaling that minty rain he knows still shrouds her. He releases her after a long while, looking down at her green sea glass eyes. He opens his mouth to ask:

"How about that cheesecake?"

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: So I got lazy at the end there, this is after all a very old oneshot that's been bunking in my files for a year and a half. I made a half-assed attempt at editing and rewriting, so I apologize for that if this kinda felt rushed. I'm back writing my other Naruto fanfic though.
> 
> From the deepest and tightest recesses of my heart, thank you for taking the time to read this, and I'm sorry if it's not that fulfilling. Nonetheless, thank you again!


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